Five Things You May Not Know About This Buenos Aires Blogger

A couple of weeks ago, Alan Patrick (he offers a regular report of highlights of BA blogs at www.buenostours.com) challenged a few Buenos Aires bloggers to share a few things that others may not know about them. Alas, he did not challenge ME, but I've decided to do it anyway.

So, here are Five Things You May Not Know About This Buenos Aires Blogger:

1) The story my husband and kids can't wait to tell people we've just met is that I was once in a band--when I was 15 years old!--that ONCE warmed up for Black Sabbath. Yes, Ozzy Osbourne and I ate carrots FROM THE SAME PLATE (though not at the same time). This honestly did not seem too impressive at the time, and for years when I told my kids this story, they didn't know who the hell I was talking about. And then, of course the Osbournes became the epitome of the dysfunctional reality show family, and my kids were astounded. "THAT'S the guy? He can barely TALK!" Later, they started to think it was cool. But really, please keep in mind that this was an isolated incident--a fluke, really--that happened in 1975. It in no way confirms anything about either my musical ability or my backstage tendencies. Still, it makes for some good gasps during dinner conversations.

2) I grew up in the tiny town of Gaston, Oregon--population: 325. Or actually, I grew up on a ten-acre mini-farm three miles OUTSIDE of Gaston on a dusty gravel road. My graduating class had 36 people. I was the valedictorian. And the Homecoming queen. And a prom princess. Hey, we all had to do our share. Gaston was a very agricultural community and all the kids worked in the the fields. We even got ten excused absences every September to work in the onion harvest. School got out early in June so we could get out in the fields to pick the strawberries. Shortly after my years of field labor ended, they made a new law that only those 12 and over could work in the fields. We thought that was so lame. Everyone knows the best workers are, like, ten years old--after the age of 12, all they do is stare at the cute girl/boy at the weigh-in stand or find someone to go and make out behind the outhouses. And now I cannot believe that anyone would ever make out behind an outhouse, but, well, we Gaston kids did what we had to do.

3) I met my husband in rural northern Japan. That's not so interesting unless you know that we grew up in towns just ten miles apart in Oregon. I was in Gaston, he was in Hillsboro, which was also a bit of a hick town but it was WAY bigger than my town. His dad was an attorney so he also grew up in a whole different way. While I spent five years (ages 10 to 15) living in a garage with only tar-paper as siding, he lived in a very nice home and his parents were going on trips to Mexico every year. Still, we had a lot in common, so we connected. Besides, we were absolutely the ONLY SINGLE AMERICANS in the entire town of Mutsu--no, the entire AREA including several towns--so what were we going to do? Of course we got together, though we were platonic teaching partners for nine months before that happened. Another note: Tom is three years younger than me. We got married when we were 21 and 24. This seems far freakier to us now than it did then.

4) I was the lightning rod that got one of the first skateboard parks in Oregon built. Tom and I owned a snowboard/skateboard shop and a vintage/cool clothing store at the time. And the skateboarders had no place to skate except the sidewalks, which pissed off the store owners who would then come and express their frustration to us. We got the kids together and decided to figure out how and where to build a skatepark in our town. This was way back--before the parks bureaus had anything to do with building skateparks. So, you could say we had some educating to do. As it turned out, I had to face down Tom's dad--my father-in-law--who was the city attorney and not at all in favor of the park. It was interesting. But I totally blew everyone away with my presentation--and the fact that about 50 scrubbed, attentive and respectful skaters were right there with me. And we earned the privilege to build a very, very basic skatepark for which we raised $10,000. Yes, well, it was basic, as I said, but quite an exciting thing. About five years later, the city decided to build a bigger/better skatepark on the same site. They paid $500,000 for it. Well, someone has to get these things started. I have memories of being elated and terrified and frustrated throughout the process, which is pretty much the way you can tell if something was a Cool Thing.

5) I'm adopted and met my birth mother when I was 17. She was 21 when I was born, the result of an affair she had with a married man who was 37 and had a 16 year old son. He told her he was "separated" from his wife. Well, he was--by about a thousand miles. He stood by her throughout the whole pregnancy, though--marked by two suicide attempts and one day in which she showed up at his workplace with a gun--and was there when I was born. I was adopted two days later by a couple that had been waiting for a few years for a baby but had subsequently become pregnant, so a month after I was adopted, they had their son. Anyway, I've met and love my mother's family. I am happy I had a chance to know my half-brother before he died of AIDS in 1990. My father, a widower, lives in Florida, where he manages to keep the widows happy thanks to regular doses of Viagra. He is 83, and recently one of his lady friends was injured when a piece of shrapnel from his back (he was shot down three times over the Pacific--has three Purple Hearts) came out and cut her hand. Ed recently confessed that he sired TWO OTHER SIBLINGS--one woman who is half-Chinese and a physician in Hawaii (the result of an affair with the Chinese maid in the admiral's house while stationed in Hawaii), and the other is a man my age (a few months older!) somewhere on the East coast. Let me assure you that this little piece of news caused my mother to become absolutely livid. After all, she had trusted my father when he told her back in 1959 that he had a "groin injury" (this is true) and that therefore she didn't need to worry about getting pregnant (clearly not true). Good thing she didn't hear about this back when she was toting a gun. Anyway. Quite the scoundrel, but I have to say that I do admire his, um, spunk.

Okay, those are a few of my stories. I guess they were a bit longer than the other things I've seen posted, such as "Until I was 22, I hated dulce de leche."

Sorry. I like words, remember? ;-)